Calming the rage within

Those of you who have had the privilege (and it is a privilege) of riding in a car while I'm driving know that I am not exactly the epitome of serenity behind the wheel. As a matter of fact, some of the things that I do could (possibly) be classified as road rage-y.

Now, despite the wide variety of (highly justified) reasons I have for screaming at, giving dirty looks to, and questioning the ancestry of my fellow drivers (see previous posts for examples), I have decided that it may not be best for me and my family if I continued along my present path. And so, several months ago, I decided that, for better or for worse, I needed to calm the road warrior within me and embrace the zen of Utah driving. With that goal in mind, I set off on my plan.

First idea - remembering scores of talks from my young men's leaders about how music affects us, I decided to switch my commuting music habits. No more alternative, rock, classic rock, heavy metal, hair metal, death metal, or polka. I now listened to two stations exclusively - KBYU and KUED (utah's PBS affiliates). What did this mean for me? A steady diet of classical music, elevator jazz, and hour-long commentaries on the poetry of Robert Frost.

It didn't work.

Turns out, I don't mind classical music, but its hard to hear anything classical at freeway speeds (at least in my car - maybe new cars actually make an attempt to block out engine noise). All of the rest of that stuff - not my cup of tea.

So the great music experiment (which lasted a month) didn't end up helping too much.

Next idea - slow down. I've noticed that most of my rage comes from people who have a complete inability to understand the concept of multiple lanes on a freeway. I figured that if I never even tried to drive in the passing lane, I wouldn't get mad at the people who instead used the passing lane as a put-on-your-makeup lane. What did this entail for me? Always leave with plenty of time to get from one place to another without needing to be in a hurry.... let's just say that idea two didn't last near as long as idea one.

By this point, I was getting desperate, as my genius daughter was learning new vocabulary at an amazing rate. As a quick fix, I began referring to all my fellow drivers as 'buddy'. (as in "hey buddy, watch where you're going!" or "get in your own lane buddy!")

Anyways, to make a long story less long: I am happy to report that I now am in complete control of myself as I drive down the freeway, and all without the aid of bonsai trees, rock gardens, or sand patterns. What's the secret to my newfound inner peace? My ipod. I love that thing, and the free downloads of podcasts like cartalk, wait wait don't tell me, and the bill simmons report. Any ideas for other (free) pod-tainment?

... and one other thing about Utah

So this post isn't about driving, just another thing that really bugs me - people.

For those of you not watching local Salt Lake City news - the Jordan School District has recently undergone a nasty divorce from the newly-formed Canyons School District. JSD, formerly the largest school district in Utah, and one of the largest in the country, is now flat broke. Without going into the details of all the (stupid) 'cost-cutting' measures that are currently underway to try (in vain) to keep the district from going under, I want to focus on what I feel is the heart of the issue: Utahns.

The residents of the JSD pay property taxes to support the schools. These crusaders of 'self-reliance' and 'liberty' are now begging the rest of the state (i.e. us*) for tax money to support their bloated and under-funded schools, while at the same time once again voting down a tax increase. Now my sympathy glands were just about to kick until I heard the following: average property taxes for people in the district range from $10-15/month. These people will proudly tell you how they have not had a tax increase in over twelve years (way to stick it to the man! er.. your kids!).

Places I regularly spend more than $10-15/month include:
Wendys
Subway
Cable TV
DVR service
RedBox
etc...

Seriously folks, give up the delicious, delicious five dollar footlongs and help some poor teacher keep his/her job!

*Thanks to our family's ongoing plan to never actually own a house (3.75 years and counting) we don't actually pay property taxes, but if we did...

Maybe I am a bad Driver

So roughly last year I asked the question of whether or not I am a bad driver. This morning I finally received my answer.... and here's the story

Mondays are not typically my favorite day of the week and early mornings are not typically my favorite time of day. Needless to say, early Monday mornings are just about the worst part of the week for someone like me. This morning was especially awesome, because I had to be at the hospital for work very, very early. (ok, 7:15 AM, which really isn't that early, but I'm the one telling the story here) I managed to roll out of bed, shower, and get dressed by 7 - which would have been fine if the hospital weren't a 25 minute drive away. Luckily early morning traffic isn't too bad along my route. Unluckily, I still live in Utah, in the winter. When I went out to my car (late and still half-asleep) my windshield was still frosted over.

I gave a half-hearted attempt at scraping some spots clear to see through, cranked the defrost up to maximum and hit the road. By the time I got to State St it was apparent, even through my sleep-induced haze, that I couldn't actually see the road. I was navigating by the glare of the red light through the frost. Not willing to be later than I actually was, and not willing to actually get out and scrape the windshield I did the only reasonable thing to do in that situation. I rolled down the passenger window, stuck my head out, and got on the freeway.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I'm a bad driver.

(and I made it on time!)